Soulmates are hard to come by and understanding that they indeed are your soulmates is tough and tricky as well.
Moreover given societal conditioning, man has developed an innate need to be toxically non-committal and (if I must) Byronic; this has led to not only women ending up in despair over romantic relationships but also sometimes hurt beyond repair.
Here we have enlisted 9 essential differences between a keeper and a fling; ladies, take note.
1. If it doesn’t feel right soon, it’s probably not right
If you see the guy spending time with you, going out, making out, partying but still stalling the big commitment talk, it’s probably because he treats you like a conquest; an arm candy he can exchange later. If however, you see him bringing up the commitment talk first and actually wanting to commit soon after you start dating, there’s a high chance that he is your keeper.
2. Future pep-talk
If someone’s a keeper they would envision a future with you together. You would find them talking about it a lot too. A fling would not do that because he knows one of you is going to be flung.
From gifts to oral pleasure, if returning the favor is not his strong suit, he is probably just testing waters and will leave soon. The opposite would be the case with a keeper. Reciprocation won’t be something you even think about with a keeper.
Men are sort of kind of designed to not listen to what the other person has to say. If you happen to have someone who does, however, care about your hopes and dreams, he’s a keeper. Otherwise, meh, a waste of time.
Remember the popular saying that men think with their genitals? Yes, it’s true. If you are with someone who through hints makes it clear that he’s not willing to wait for sex at all, be sure. He is a fling who wants to have the cake before he is flung. If however, the guy is patient and ready to wait for it, keeper through and through.
6. You are being adequately pleasured
Guys concentrate on their pleasure a lot. There is a fascinating article online that speaks of how when men say they have good sex it means they came; on the other hand when women say they have had good sex, most of the times it just means they weren’t hurt. So if you see him concentrating on your needs more than usual, a keeper.
If you find yourself meeting him at a place that interests you both and not somewhere that is just convenient for sex, a keeper. Simple.
Flings will want to impress you by wanting to pay but then making sure to get out of it with some excuse. Keepers, if they want to pay/can pay for both of you, will pay.
9. The L-word
You know the drill: flings don’t say it. Keepers can’t get enough of the word.